I wish real life were more like Disneyland.
First of all, things would be cleaner.
There'd be theme music in the background.
You could always find a trash can.
Or a bathroom.
Or an interesting attraction.
Most folks would be smiling.
Several would have name tags, so you'd know whom to ask for help.
There would also be a map.
Of course, the food would be subpar.
But you could could walk to everything.
Sure, there would be lines, but we'd have FastPasses, too.
The surroundings would be safe.
No weapons, except the harmless rifles in the Frontierland Shootin' Arcade, plastic Swords in the Pirate shop and an occasional Buzz Lightyear ray gun.
The whole family would have fun together, or go off on their own if they needed a break.
"We'll meet back at the Castle in an hour, or text where and when you want to meet!"
Things would be accessible to everybody, even if you have a disability or a condition that might otherwise limit your ability to participate.
Monorails.
We'd have those, too.
And a Skyway (while we're at it).
The tour guides would wear plaid.
No Congress.
Abe Lincoln would be our president.
Fireworks.
Every night in the summer.
Dole whips for the whole bar!
You can bump the car ahead of you and no one gets hurt or sues.
Disney dollars and no mortgage or global economic collapse.
There's a Hub where we can all meet and no one is disputing land boundaries.
Tomorrowlanders do not suicide bomb Fantasylanders.
West Siders would still have a justifiable superiority complex, though. Some things are just a given.
No hospital.
We have Central First Aid on Main Street.
The weather's nice most of the year.
Everything is decorated for the holidays.
You should see the place on Christmas!
We would all be either Cast Members or guests.
We could even trade off.
Flowers.
Lots of flowers.
In well-kept beds.
No TV.
No Internet.
Dixieland Jazz and our very own marching band.
Kids. Plenty of kids.
Age doesn't matter.
Shade and benches aplenty.
Crowds. I could do without crowds.
Still it is better when we share.
But.
And I'm just wondering out loud here.
Where would everyone sleep?
As we say in Disneyland,
"Ride's over. Get out."
---Mike
