You might be a current or former Disneyland cast member...
...if you can instantly spot a cast member parking lot hang tag dangling from the rear view mirror of the car behind you on the freeway.
...if you find yourself giving a total stranger directions---and pointing with two fingers.
...if guests come up and ask you for directions while you're visiting the Park---even though you are not in costume and aren't wearing a nametag!! (How do they know??)
...if mention of the letters "E.R." triggers happy thoughts, as opposed to visions of hospital crises.
...if you ALWAYS step into the shortest of two lines ("Both sides are open folks!").
...if you smell popcorn and think of the Hub or the Frontier Landing rather than a movie theater.
...if you find yourself irresistibly compelled to "Put a Smile in Your Voice," when answering a phone at work.
...if, when visiting the Park as a guest prior to a parade, you find yourself subconsciously looking around for poles and a plug-puller.
...if you find yourself hanging a hard right at the north end of Main Street to grab lunch at the Inn Between, even though you're off duty or haven't been "on duty" officially for many years!
...if you spot a lost child in the Park and find yourself grabbing the nearest costumed cast member or security officer to help.
...if you still feel strange parking in the "regular" guest parking structure.
...if you can make your way through a teeming crowd without missing a beat.
...if you encounter a crowd of confused people anywhere (inside or outside the Park) and instinctively reach for a coned flashlight (even though you don't carry one anymore) and have to stifle yourself from intoning: "This is a walkway, please stay to the right!"
...if people consistently describe you as "approachable" and easy to talk with.
...if friends still ask if you can sign them into the Park.
...if you exchange a knowing glance with "on duty" cast members when you're in the Park as a "guest" (we know who WE are!).
...if you start to head toward the Plaza or Center Street or the Town Square gates when it's time to leave---rather than toward the exits at the Main Entrance.
...if you have to fight the urge to step back stage when you pass your old haunts during a Park visit (break areas, area lockers, CDS terminal locations, etc.)
...if, when encountering a group of people, your first urge is to ask, "How many in your group?" and to advise, "Two on Row 1, two on Row 2, and two on Row 3."
...if, during Fireworks, you find yourself watching the crowd around you as much as the show in the sky.
...if you see a less than diligent or discourteous Disneyland cast member interacting poorly with a guest and it irks you to the core (a rare occurrence, fortunately).
...if you ALWAYS know where the closest restroom, food service location, FastPass distribution location or outdoor vending stand is, no matter where in the Park you may find yourself.
...if you find yourself poking around the internet for odd little blogs like this!
---Mike