Monday, April 28, 2008

Jungle Cruise - Pull Over!

This is a classic Jungle Cruise prank, best performed at night.

First, you need a seasoned skipper (Skipper 1) and a boatful of guests. Now send them out into the jungle and give them about 3-5 minutes lead time.

Next, a Lead and another seasoned skipper (Skipper 2) grab the motorized skiff and a flashlight and head out into the jungle after the Jungle boat.

When the skiff catches up to Skipper 1 and his boat (preferably around the African Veldt), the Lead flashes his flashlight while he and Skipper make siren noises. They proceed to "pull over" the Jungle boat skipper (Skipper1), just before the Hippo Pool.

Then Skipper 2 (in the skiff) boards the Jungle boat and announces that its skipper (Skipper 1) has violated Jungle Cruise policies for the last time ("by returning with 3 empty boats so far today" or "by offering guests as appetizers to natives in headhunter country," etc., etc.) and generally makes a commotion, followed by a ceremonious and overly dramatic "arrest" of Skipper 1. Skipper 2 then directs Skipper 1 off the Jungle boat---to the surprise of his crew of slightly stunned guests---and onto the skiff with the Lead waiting on board. The skiff is usually nice and close to shore and on the "Rhino" side of the river, so as to minimize the risk of blowing the prank by having Skipper 1, the Lead or Skipper 2 fall into the Jungle juice aka "The River."

In any event, after getting arrested and kicked off his boat, Skipper 1 is now hastily spirited away in the skiff at full speed (heading back to the dock along the regular route home---i.e., past Schweitzer Falls) as though being hauled off to a booking facility.

Next, Skipper 2 announces to his newly-acquired boatload of bewildered guests: "Sorry for that folks. Glad we finally nailed that guy. Now, where were we?" He then finishes up the rest of the cruise as though nothing had happened, picking up in the spiel where Skipper 1 left off.

As a topper, the true pros at this prank would have Skipper 1 waiting back at the dock surrounded by a "guard" of two or three other skippers standing by him while he pleads for bail money from the guests exiting the boat.

There were several variations of this prank, but they all played out about the same.

Remember, the above was performed over 20 years ago by trained professionals. Don't try this at home!